Every time I vacuum the floor, I get SOOO turned on by the sexy vacuum cleaner trying to seduce me with its siren song, that I lose control and fuck that vacuum cleaner's brains out! My vacuum cleaner is the happiest (and most satisfied) cleaner in the world. It loves me.

i use to put my cock in a milking unit out at the barn started when i was seven wow it just milks u at ten year old my mom would my cock was bigger then my dads not a better pump out there every so often mom would want to see my cock if vit was getting bigger i pump every day not even knowing about pumps

mine won't fit; my cock is too thick. I wouldn't try it anyway...just too stupid.

I did once. Now all that's left of my 9 inch penis is this 5 inch stub.

obviously I havent , but I do remember as a student reading a paper in The Lancet entitled 'Penile Injuries Caused By Vacuum Cleaners' ... it was both horrific ( the injuries ) and hilarious ( the excuses given in A&E by patients ! ) .

Keep a had close to the on/off switch!

No....I preffer a pussy

Yip, but the swimming pool pipe is a better size. Just beware - the pool pump will suck your dick right off if you are not careful...

nope dont like the sound of that

Yes, a Shop Vac. I had to adapt the Vac's hose with some plumbing pvp for my cock to fit ( I'm pretty standard size). Tested it throughly to make sure it wasn't going to suck any vital parts in. Then lubed up heavily, turned the Vac on and let it slowly suck my dick in. I don't know what I was expecting. It made a lot of sucking noises and that was it. A monumental waste of time. Spend $35.00 on a good, starter penis pump and some rubber cock rings and you'll get what you and your dick were looking for. That's what I did and my pumped-up cock loves me for it....Douglas.

nope i think that can be dangerous