If you have read any of my blog post you know that I am a pain slut. I have been in numerous situations where I was exposed to situations where the pain was more than I cold handle but I stuck in there.

I have talked of my husband George, God rest his soul. George was my enabler for the things we did, swinging etc and then mostly the pain and abuse stuff. George was a voyeur and he loved watching me squirm. But we had problems in our marriage and this story discusses a time where I had left George. George had gotten tired of the way we were living. He was tired of enabling my pain desires. He was tired of nursing me back to good health. He hated that I had gotten into drugs, really gotten onto drugs. In fact I was so into drugs that he had to “fire” me, his wife, from our company because I kept embarrassing him and the company. Although he was a voyeur he still wanted us to do “swinging” kind of things but I wanted pain and abuse only. I was 43 when I left him for the second time. The first time is a separate story. I was living the life of a druggie, living in a seedy roadside motel. I had all the money I needed, thus drugs were no problem, but I felt like my living arrangements fit my lifestyle. I spent most of the day drugged out of my mind and I was looking like a skank.

Everybody remember Craigslist, right. A favorite way to meet all sorts of deviant people back in the day. I was finding most of my sexual partners on their and with the right coded messages, most of my drugs.

I had been posting on Craigslist forever, and had hundred and hundreds of contacts. I added each response to my email contacts. One day, stoned as usual and oh so horny I decide on a plan to get lots of cock. I was laying on my grimy bed. I was staying in a motel that should have been condemned. I was probably the only long term resident as most of the others were renting the room by the hour. Sheets were never changed the months I was there.

I ate 6 yellow Xanax bars. While Xanax was know to decrease sexual libido I took the medicine to calm me down. My libido was way to high when I was drugged up. I showered, and did my makeup and hair. I looked in the mirror and wondered where the good looking woman I used to be had gone. Then I logged into Hotmail, and wrote a mass e-mail to all the contacts I had collected from Craigslist.

Here is my email:

Dirty Slut just wants to be USED (*tonight*
11/21/1990)

Hi, This is Sara [(fake name obviously)], in the past you have responded to my Craigslist posts. I'm 43 years old, not ugly (lol), slutty, currently dressed like a whore, and staying at the No Tell Motel near the Atlanta airport. I want to be raped, used, smacked, choked and filled with cum from strangers. I'm really looking for big cocks (especially BBC), but don't let that stop you I really don't care who uses me.

Don't email me back, I'll be busy and fucked up all night, so if you want to come over and give me some cum I'm in room #15. Ground floor, plenty of parking There is nothing illegal about this, I'm free (but if you want to tip me I LOVE Xanax, Ecstasy, Adderall, any kind of drugs, legal or illegal). There will be a large University of Georgia red G sign attached to the door, and it will be propped open.

Sara

I put a USB stick in the back of the TV in the room, and selected "Play all" (12 Gb's of the filthiest porn videos that I used to poison my mind while I'm being used). I stepped around the room and made sure that the two spy cameras were on and set up for motion capture. If it wasn't for the videos I wouldn't know most of the things I had done. I turned off the lights so that the XXX videos on the screen lit the room, and crawled onto the bed. I reached over to the nightstand and took 3 more bars out of the bottle and shoved 3 in my asshole. I took a Magic Marker and drew Tips Accepted with an arrow pointed at my pussy.

I could feel the pills kicking in, and the porn on the screen became hypnotic. My pussy was tickling and burning as my body desire to be used. I mounted my big pink dildo, and dropped myself on it! Pain shot through my body as the toy slammed into my pussy without any lubrication. Guess I should have lubricated it
.
The porn on the screen started to get blurry as tears formed in my eyes, but I could still hear the girls
screaming and moaning. Without thinking I started sucking my thumb, which made me grind the toy deeper and harder into my body.

The door creaked open, and the first stranger walked in (I'm sure he heard me moaning and the girls on the screen). He walked over to the edge of the bed rubbing his cock outside his jeans.

I lay back on the bed and laid my head under his cock as he unzipped (During all of this, I never stopped fucking myself with my pink toy). He took my thumb out of my mouth, pulled my head off the support of the bed. My head now hanging off the bed, my throat was lined up for his cock. He then slammed his cock deep into my mouth, then even deeper into my throat. As his cock became harder he started to speed up, grabbing both of my arms and pinning them to the bed. Pre-cum and spit started dripping down my face as he fucked my throat, deeper and deeper down my throat, he would hold his cock deep in my throat until I gagged and when I tried to move away from his cock swelling in my mouth he head the back of my head so that I could not move away from his cock. I felt like I was about to pass out. My arms dropped to my side and he immediately pulled his dick out of my mouth. Long strings of spit and drool hung between his dick and my mouth.

He pushed his dick as far as he could, once again, and I could feel spurts of hot cum hitting the inside of my throat. I went limp, holding back my gag reflex and holding my breath until he had finished.

When his cock stopped jerking, he pulled it out of my throat giving me a chance to breathe. He put his pants back on, grabbed a $20 bill and shoved it up my pussy and walked out. The door slammed back propped against the latch as I went back to fucking myself and watching the TV screen.

I saw headlights outside the window. As the footsteps got closer to the door I started fucking myself a little harder thinking about the cock I was about to get.

The door opened slowly, and a man looking to be in his mid 30's walked in. He watched me fuck myself for a few seconds and said, "You are a dirty bitch aren't you?"

I smiled, as he unbuttoned his pants.

He grabbed the back of my head and shoved my face down on his cock. I gagged at first, but started to take him in as my throat relaxed. After only about 30 seconds he pulled out and came all over my face and tongue, asked for my number, and left.

I had cum from having 2 men in my belly, but really needed cock inside me. I cleaned up by wiping the leftover cum into my mouth.

I was licking the last of the cum off my fingers when a young black guy knocked on the door (even though it was propped). He came in and stood before me looking at me with a little hint of disgust on his face.

I looked up at him and said, “Hi Daddy, will you help out a girl?” He shook his head in the affirmative. I gave him my coyest look and said, “Hit me”. He immediately backhanded me in the face, knocking me completely off the bed. I felt blood run from my nose and mouth and damn it, it felt like I had a loose tooth. I raised up on my knees and smiled at him. “Is that all you got?” I guess that stirred him up because he backhanded once more. I spit out blood and damn it one of my front teeth.

He reached out and grabbed a handful of my hair and he drug me back up onto the bed. He then took off all his clothes, got on the bed, and pushed my legs apart. My pink toy slid out as my body tensed up, "You nasty fucking cunt, you like black dick huh?" he said.

"Yes sir I do, it's my favorite," I replied.

He lifted his cock up to my pussy and smacked it up and down a few times, and slammed it inside me. “What the fuck his this?”, he said,reaching down toward my pussy and coming up with a $20 bill. He spread my legs, pushed my feet in the air, and continued to pull his cock all the way out of me, and slam it back in. He leaned down and despite the blood, he stuck his tongue in my mouth and pounded away for 10 minutes or so. I felt his body tense as he unloaded his cum inside me.

"Thank you," I said.

"You on the pill?" he asked.

"No," I replied.

He pulled his pants up, walked over and picked up the $20 bill and roughly jammed it back up my pussy as I lay there. He lit a cigarette, and walked out. When I saw his headlights turn on, I slid my pink toy back inside me to hold the cum in, got back up on my knees, and lit a blunt.

The Xanax were really starting to take effect now, everything felt good, and all I wanted to do was fuck. I could feel the black strangers cum inside me. I alternated fucking myself, and cleaning the dildo with my mouth until I couldn't taste cum anymore.

I was afraid to look in a mirror as I am sure that the left side of my face was a mess and there would be that gap where the tooth had been.

I saw the door open again from the corner of my eye, and two cute boys in their mid-twenties came in. They stood at the foot of the bed and said,” Damn girl, who did you piss off?” They took off their clothes and climbed on the bed. One started kissing me while the other started to suck his friends cock.

I moved down the bed, and started helping his friend lick and kiss all over his dick. After about 2 minutes, the friend got behind me, leaving me with the other boy's cock in my mouth. I said, “Wait a minute,” and fished the $20 bill out of my pussy.

He slid his cock inside me, and slowly fucked me while I enjoyed the other boy's dick. I could taste pre-cum, and I knew what was coming as the boy in my mouth started to jerk. When his buddy saw this, he started to fuck me harder and faster, and shot his cum inside me. I was still holding cum in my mouth when I felt my pussy being filled.

As the boy behind me pulled out, his cum poured out of me onto the bedspread. I swallowed the load in my mouth, and licked up what had poured out of me.

They left me $40. I stopped them from putting the money in my pussy.

A guy I had been talking to just sent me a text, and told me he would be in the parking lot shortly. He says he's bringing me some good stuff. In about 2 minutes he walked in, and handed me ae bottle of pills without saying much. I looked at the bottle and there were perhaps twenty of so pills inside and they were various shapes and sizes. I screwed the top off the bottle and took two pills, kind of a drug roulette.

He immediately started feeling my body and fingering my pussy.

I spread my legs for him, inviting him to come use me. At this point I could hardly think straight. He got on top of me, and sunk his cock into my pussy. He pulled his cock all the way out of me each time before slamming it back in. He pulled back, and accidentally slammed it into my asshole, all at once.

He pulled out of my ass, and put his cock back in my pussy. I wanted to scream from the pain but I had been told that if I screamed too much I was going to have to leave the motel. .I had developed a deep breathing routine to mask the pain. He held his hand over my mouth, and exploded deep inside my pussy.

As soon as he shot his cum inside me, he got dressed and ran out of the room as if I was hurt and going to call the police, lol.

When I stopped sobbing, I pushed his cum out of me, into my hand, and licked it up. My ass was hurting pretty good and I remembered the viscous lidocaine the dentist had given me for mouth sores. I ran into the bathroom, grabbed the bottle and squirted some on to two fingers and worked the idocaine around the edge of my anal sphincter. Ah blessed relief.

I was really fucked up (I wouldn't even remember most of this is it wasn't for the webcam footage). A black man in his mid-thirties walks in the room and says, "You look sexy as hell! I wish I could stay and fuck you longer, but I've only got about 15 minutes.

“My younger cousin is in the car, and I can't leave him out there that long."I walked to the window and looked outside, and there really was a younger black guy in the car. I opened the door and walked nude to the passenger side of the car, "Do you wanna come in here with your friend and play?"

He didn't say anything, but got out of the car and came into the room. The older cousin had a big cock, but his young cousin (who was apparently 17) had a HUGE cock. I got on my knees and took turns sucking their cocks.

After a couple minutes, the older man pulled me up on his lap, and settled me down on his cock. It was a lot bigger than my toy or anybody that had fucked me yet tonight.

His cock thrust into my body as I started to fuck myself on it, still sucking the younger cousin's even larger cock. The younger cousin withdrew his cock from my mouth and moved behind the older one. While I was fucking him, I could feel the younger cousin pressing his cock up against my already stuffed pussy. I knew what he was thinking, but kept fucking the older man in front of me. He spread my ass apart, and started to shove his cock into my pussy too!

I tried to say "No" but the older cousin held me down by the arms while the younger cousin kept going deeper inside me. It felt like my pussy was being ripped apart as the younger cousin started to fuck me faster and deeper. I was screaming inside my head, letting these two strangers rip into my body.

Every time the younger cousin lifted up, or repositioned himself, I could feel my skin tearing, and I knew I had to be bleeding. The older cousin started to moan and thrust, and in about 30 seconds I could feel cum coating the inside of my pussy. This lubrication was all the younger cousin needed. He dug his fingers into my ass, and shot his cum into me too, mixing it with the cum from his older cousin.

They pulled out of me, and cum with streaks of blood dripped down my ass and legs. I rolled over on the bed as they dressed, and closed my eyes exhausted and drugged. About 30 seconds after they left, the door opened again, and the older cousin walked in again.

He rolled me over, spread my legs, and shoved a crumbled $20 bill in my pussy. The rough edges hurt like hell, but I loved having that dirty money inside my ripped pussy. I reached over to the table and grabbed the lidocaine and squirted a big glob into the palm on hand and rubbed the lidocaine all over my pussy to relieve the pain.

The second man that used me tonight walked in the room again. He brought me a half quarter of weed; I threw it under the bed, and lay back down. He was trying to talk to me about his work, and some other bullshit, but I wasn't able to concentrate on anything except the gangbang slut taking cum on the screen.

I looked over and said, "I can hardly keep my eyes open, I don't really wanna talk, but you can use me again if you want to daddy."

He didn't say another word. He got on top of me, and slid his cock inside my pussy. I could feel where it had been ripped by the black buys before him but there was little pain, my entire body had started going numb, mostly from the Xanax. I closed my eyes, and passed out while he was fucking me.

The next thing I remember was the door slamming against the latch as he was leaving.

I got a call from somebody who said that him and a few friends were coming by pretty soon. I wasn't able to stay awake at this point, so I took a 30 mg Adderall. After all the night was still young. I got my other toy out of my backpack, grabbed my pink toy off the floor, and lay back down on the bed. My favorite zooskool compilation was playing so I reached over and grabbed the dog knot dildo out of my drawer and shoved it into my pussy.

My ripped pussy was starting to hurt once again and so I grabbed more of the lidocaine and squirted lots more of it onto the toy, and fucked myself hard. The girl on TV was licking up puppy cum out of a doggie dish, and it was making me desire a dog.

Then 2 thin skinheads walked in. They saw the state I was in and one said, "Do you like X?" "fuck yes I love it!" I mumbled. “Gimme, gimme.” One of them handed me a single pill which I eagerly tossed into my mouth.

I had taken so many pills that I couldn't think straight, much less speak. "You ready for 2 dicks bitch?!," One asked. My eyes were forcing themselves shut, and I couldn't answer. They walked closer to the bed, shook me a little and said, "Hey girl, you in there?"

"She's fucked up man," one of them said.

I tried to open my eyes for a second and smiled, "I'm here," I giggled. Just as I closed my eyes, one of them grabbed me by the hair, jerked me up, and smacked my face a few times.

I opened my eyes as they placed a small glass mirror in front of me. He tapped out 3 piles of white powder on the mirror, rolled up a $20 bill, and lowered my head to the powder. "Sniff these piles... Hey! Look at me! Sniff these piles one at a time!" he ordered.

I sniffed over and over as he moved from one pile to the other. As the speed began to sink in, I started
rubbing all over my body, I was tingling everywhere and everything tickled. One of the men lay down on the bed, took out my plug, and pulled me onto his lap, shoving his cock into my ass.

His friend got behind us pushed his cock alongside the other boys cock, and stretched it into my ass too.

"OH GOD!" I moaned as they stretched my asshole apart! I could taste the coke dripping down my sinuses while they beat their cocks into my body. The boy underneath me grabbed his cock from my ass, and shoved it in my cunt, and I giggled as my stretched skin relaxed and it started to feel good again.

Suddenly the boy in my ass withdrew quickly and shoved my ass to the floor. “What the fuck. I can't feel my dick. What did you do you dumb fucking whore.” Deep in the recesses of my brain it registered that lidocaine was not a good lubricant. The guy stood there pulling on his cock and calling me every name he could think of.

“I'll fix you he said and he quickly left the room. His friend sat there the whole time pulling on his cock obviously suffering from a similar lack of feeling.

The other skinhead burst back into the room, locked the door and came up to me as I lay in a heap on the floor and told me to kneel on the floor. I did so. “I don't know what you did but the feelings coming back so we're good, OK?” I nodded in the affirmative.

“So lets get back to fucking,” he lay on the floor and told me to mount him, which I did. Then he told me that he had a surprise for me and I immediately thought more X. He asked me to raise my eyes to the ceiling and keep them there.

He fucked me like this for a few minutes and then he turned to his buddy and said one word, “Pliers”. It was a testament to how stoned I was that even though I am sure that I heard the word, I did not react. With my eyes locked on the ceiling, I could not see what he was about to do. Later on, looking at the video, I watched his right hand take the pliers from his buddy and move toward my left tit. He opened the jaws up with one hand so they were wider than my nipple, and then, taking great care so he would not accidentally get any of the less sensitive tit-meat further back, suddenly squeezed the pliers shut, directly on my left nipple. The reaction was instantaneous. I screamed, out loud – very loud. My hands and arms grabbed for my tit and and I struggled to remove the pliers, the skinhead said, “Move your hands away or I will tear your nipple off.” I dropped my hands to my side afraid of what would happen if I didn’t do as he had told me. The skinhead slowly increased the pressure on her nipple, keeping me screaming. As I continued to fuck him the skinhead kept his hand holding the pliers still so that every time I came up, it pulled painfully on my nipple. My breathing was very labored, but I didn’t stop fucking him. After about half a minute – which seemed like a lot longer – the skinhead let my nipple go. That ended my screams, which trailed off to whimpers. The teeth marks on my nipple from the pliers were clear to see. He moved the tool to his left hand, then extended them toward my right tit, jaws open again. Once more, the teeth closed on my nipple, crushing it. I screamed again, this time a piercing scream that really showed how much it hurt. But I didn’t stop riding him or move my eyes. I continued my slow sliding up and down his cock, even as he was hurting me. The other skinhead moved into the double penetration position and slid his cock up my ass.

"I'm about to cum in this bitch bro," the skinhead said to his friend while he waved the pliers around. I felt my cunt filling with hot fluid as the skinhead in my ass started to groan. That must have sent his friend over the edge because within 10 seconds I could feel his cum stinging the rips and cuts inside my abused ass.

They both slowly pumped both of my holes and they emptied their balls into my body. They pulled their cocks out of me, and knelt over my face letting me clean my ass and pussy off of their dicks. When they were done, they got up, got dressed, and the skinhead that had been in my ass tapped out 2 lines on the dresser and left the rolled $20 beside it. "Thanks skank," the other said as they walked out.

"You're welcome," I giggled. When they left I licked up all the leftover cum I could find on the bed, got on my knees, and started grinding on my dog knot toy and watching the porn on the screen.

I was doing some of the lines on the dresser when 2 young black thugs walked in the room. They walked in the room wearing sunglasses, and smelled like weed smoke and cologne. I got on my hands and knees as if to offer my ass and pussy to them, and laid there sucking my thumb.

One of them sat down in the chair beside the bed and started watching the video on TV while the other got on the bed with me. He pulled down his pants, and whipped out a really nice black cock.

I licked on my fingers, reached around and started fingering my ass in case he wanted to use it, but he
didn't. While I was fingering my ass he rammed his cock inside my cunt and started to fuck me. I moaned and whimpered as he used me, waiting for my reward. He fucked me for about 5 minutes and unloaded his cum inside my nasty pussy. He got up to get dressed, and his friend immediately took his place behind me.

Just like his buddy, he shoved his cock inside me, fucked me for about 5 minutes, and shot his cum inside me to mix with the cum from his friend. They got dressed, and left. As the door slammed against the latch, I turned around to lick up the puddle that had formed underneath me. I grabbed my toy and shoved it inside me. It didn't hurt as much as it did earlier, and I wanted it to.

I took off my heels, and started to move my feet around the bed trying to force myself down harder on my toys. I could see the pink glitter polish on my toes while my feet wandered around the bed. The threads of my fishnets on the bottom of my feet started to get wet from the leftover cum from the boys that had soaked into the bedspread.

I was exhausted, but strung out. My heart was beating fast but I can hardly keep my eyes open. I grabbed the 4 pillows from the head of the bed, stacked them up, and got on top of them propping my ass in the air. As my head hits the bedspread I feel so fucked up and relaxed, my eyes closed, and I passed out.

I wake up (kinda) hearing the door open and close. I hear 2 men whispering to each other, while one lights a cigarette. A couple minutes pass, and I feel the bed shake. I feel kisses and wet mouths on my legs and feet, licking all the way up to my ass and thighs. I didn't move. It felt so good laying there and relaxing I just let them do what they wanted. I was only half awake and my head was swimming.

Then I felt somebody spreading my legs apart, and fingering my pussy. A man's body leans forward and plunges a cock into my pussy and starts to slide in and out of my body. They whisper back and forth to each other while he's fucking me, but I can't tell what they are saying.

The man behind me pulls out, and shoots his cum all over my asshole and lets it drip down my pussy to the bed. They whisper as they switch positions, and another cock is shoved into my cunt. The second man cums quickly and withdraws. I can hear them whispering between the two of them. One of them says, lets do it. She is too fucked up to know what's happening and who we are. The other guys gives in and reaches into his pants pockets and pulls out a set of handcuffs. Seeing the handcuffs, I start to giggle and say, “Are you guys going to hurt me. I hope so.” One of the men handcuffs my hands behind my back and the two men stand up looking at me while they smoked a blunt. I said,”Can I have a hit. One of the men walks over and lets me take a hit off his blunt. His friend says, “Now, its time”. The man takes his blunt and takes a big drag, the end glowing bright red and then he quickly burned my right breast with the blunt. I did not scream. I just said, “That's good, keep it up. See if you can make me scream.” For the next several minutes they both burnt me over various part of my body. The worse was when one of the guys put out his blunt on my clit. I gritted my teeth throughout the entire ordeal, determined not to scream.

They left as quietly as they came in (I guess they didn't wanna disturb me, lol)

The door cracks and my eyes open as light fills the room. It's daylight. I open my eyes a little to see a
very heavy set white man. Looked like he weighed upwards of 300 pounds. He is dressed like he is on his way to work or something. In the light, he can see how abused my pussy is, and the toys lying on the floor. As he sits down on the bed, I turn my head towards his lap, and laid there looking at him, "Can I have some cum?" I asked.

He unzipped his pants, and I immediately moved to his cock and took it in my mouth. He reached down and grabbed the bottle of viscous lidocaine thinking it was lubricants. While I was getting his cock hard. He squirted a big amount onto his fingers, and reached around to molest my asshole while I sucked his cock. He was very rough forcing his fingers into my ass. First one, then two, then four fingers. I started to moan and buck my body against his fingers.

He must have taken this as some kind of sign, because he threw me down on my stomach, and spread my legs apart. He squirted more lidocaine on his fingers, and was trying to force his entire hand in my asshole. I bit down on the bedspread in front of me as his hand slowly ripped my ass open.

The pain was crazy! I yelled and cried into the bedspread as he finally managed his hand inside my butt. I tried to pull off of it, but it hurt too bad! I couldn't stretch my asshole back over his hand, I was
stuck. I thought he was going to pull his hand out of me, but instead he kept sinking his arm deeper inside me. I looked down and saw his arm was almost up to his elbow.

I was sobbing uncontrollably, and I thought he had ripped my insides apart. He pulled his hand out all at once, and before I could sigh in relief, he punched it back into my asshole. "Jeeeesusss please stop, please, you're going to kill me please!" I cried.

He was playing with his cock with his other hand, and loved hearing me cry. He pulled his arm out off my ass, "Hold your hole open," he commanded.

I caught my breath, reached around, and stretched my asshole open with two fingers from each hand. I pulled as hard as I could in both directions, opening my asshole for him. He moved closer to me while jacking his cock, leaned forward, and released his cum into the stretched open asshole in front of him.

I couldn't feel anything, but I could hear him moaning as he dropped globs of cum into my ass. He went to the bathroom, washed his hands, and left. When I was able to stop crying I rolled over and got on my knees, and started to push. Piss dribbled out of my slit as I emptied the blood and cum from my ass.

He really fucked me up inside. I stumbled to the door, and put my "Sara is not here anymore" sign on the door, closed it, and locked it.

I fell back onto the bed, and snuggled up on the cum covered bed, and fell asleep while my insides bled
inside of me.

Well, that's how that night went. I had quite a few others like it. George eventually came looking for me and convinced me to go into rehab. About two years of hard work and I was back the woman I once was.